Should I Even Pursue

So I read this whole book about how sex works. Thats actually the title of the book "How Sex Works." And so here I am still a virgin, not having done more than making out and that was just once...

Am I to live my life without knowing what sex, passion... What love is about?

Am I stuck with a curse that will never be lifted due to my disposition?

What am I to do? I ask you...

It just kills me every time.

Am I nervous?

Does the competition really scare me that much?

Why am I such a coward?

All questions with no answers. I ask myself everyday how I still have yet to experience it. All of my friends have experienced more than me. I am still stuck here with none... None whatsoever...

See theres this kid here, his name is Trevor. We call him Cupcake. He's been pretty isolated all his life. Restricted by his family and his school. He was always the awkward one. Always trying to fit in with the wrong crowds and ending up making a fool of himself in the end. I always show whatever compassion I can towards him, without being an asshole. He got laid... Three times by the same girl...

I just dont get it. I look good, Im pretty cool, Im not a slob, and I work hard... Well every once in awhile I really try to get shit done. And yet Im still lonely...

Why?

Who knows...

Well like I did in the past, when everything started really creeping out on me. I will cower and be with myself till the storm blows over. The only thing that needs protection here is me.

Aight Im out.

Have a Good One